Have you ever felt upset because you've had to yield something you wanted to someone else? That feeling of unfairness, the slight tinge of sourness? Then you tell yourself it's okay, it's better to let someone else have it. But that twist in your stomach remains knotted. To be selfish, or selfless, is that really a question even worth asking?
I really didn't want to write about this at first; it makes me seem like a bad guy, admitting to being selfish, or at the very least, had the experience of being selfish.
Lately though, I've been in a dilemma about these two polar opposites. Normally, I would say that being selfless is better, but now I've begun to wonder, to what extent is this still plausible?
To be completely selfless seems impossible. But people like Mother Theresa have achieved what people label as the epitome of selflessness. This is no longer a question of self however, but an issue of happiness and achievement.
We don't choose to be selfish for no reason at all; being selfish allows us to put our priorities first and that makes us feel better. We believe that being selfless means sacrificing our wants and in this respect, we feel upset when yielding something we want to another person.
I once read an article that mentioned kindness as being an act of selfishness. Why? The answer is simple; we are kind to others because we want to free others from their troubles, and that makes us happy. Being happy is one of our priorities; and thus, we are putting our priorities first and acting selfishly.
From this respect, as Mother Theresa was being selfless to others, she was being "selfish" to herself as she was joyful at her work. This "selfishness" isn't a bad thing at all. So being selfish - it's not really the thug in the equation.
The real issue on hand is actually the thoughts swirling like ice-cream in our heads. It isn't how 'selfish' or 'selfless' we are that counts; it's how good our thoughts are that matter.
Life is a never-ending battle between selfish and selfless. Occasionally a balance is achieved, where both parties benefit - when we have good intentions and even kinder ideas.
Be selfish in a good way. Then everyone can feel good. :)
